


No Going Back

by kozumeshouyou



Series: KenHina Collection [4]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-20
Updated: 2014-05-20
Packaged: 2018-01-25 19:56:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,858
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1660562
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kozumeshouyou/pseuds/kozumeshouyou
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He barely registered anything other than Shouyou’s position above him. Hands on either side of his head, legs straddling his waist almost like how Kenma had been picturing them earlier but this is real and so much better and Kenma liked it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	No Going Back

**Author's Note:**

> Ahh I wish I had someone to edit this because I'm lazy...

“Kenma!” A loud voice yelled, startling him out of the game he’d been playing. He paused it, knowing that Shouyou probably wanted to talk and hadn’t just been yelling his name in greeting. Kuroo who had been quietly reviewing some papers while sitting beside Kenma looked up at the Karasuno player as he stopped in front of them, smiling at Kenma and causing his heart to speed up as it usually did lately whenever Shouyou was involved.

“Shouyou?” Kenma questioned as he fidgeted a bit in his seat.

Shouyou’s hands landed on his shoulders causing Kenma’s eyes to widen slightly and he was barely able to register the question that was asked. 

“Will you set for me for a bit please?”

Kenma who had already been tense enough at the sudden physical contact felt his muscles get even tighter at the thought of being alone in a gymnasium with Shouyou. Kenma could practically feel Kuroo’s eyes burning a hole into the side of his head and he very much wanted to glare at him knowing full well that he was smirking.

Unable to think of much other than the heat that was seeping from Shouyou’s hands into Kenma’s shoulders he answered Shouyou with an ineloquent question, reprimanding himself in his head for probably the millionth time in his life for his inability to speak to someone younger than him in a more confident manor. “Uh… Why?”

Lately his thoughts had been straying more and more to the Karasuno first year, and he’d been reluctant to be around him for long periods of time now that his eyes seemed to be doing the same. He'd never been particularly interested in, well, much of anything, so it had definitely been a surprise when Kuroo had pointed out how much Kenma seemed to enjoy watching Shouyou’s matches. Of course he’d denied it, trying to keep his face as blank as he possibly could, but judging from the smirk that shows up on Kuroo’s face every time Shouyou is anywhere near them he’d still noticed Kenma’s interest.

He definitely didn’t need Kuroo figuring out just how much Shouyou occupied his thoughts even when he wasn’t watching one of Karasuno’s matches. Though Kenma was sure it wouldn’t be hidden for too much longer. Kuroo noticed everything.

“Kageyama and I are still practicing separately for a while.” 

Shouyou answered his question, seeming to perk up even more. Most likely from the thought of the new quick strike that those two had been working towards lately and his grip grew tighter on Kenma’s shoulders. Shouyou, oblivious to basically everything other than volleyball, didn’t notice the setter tense even more, which Kenma didn’t think had been physically possible seeing how tense he already was, but the pressure of his grip registered causing Kenma’s body to react under his touch and it took all of his will power to not knock away his hands.

“You have another setter.” Kenma stated, shifting his gaze away from Shouyou’s bright and pleading eyes.

“He’s practicing with the others.”

Of course he is, Kenma thought to himself somewhat bitterly but at the same time he was happy that Shouyou chose him over all of the other available setters at the training camp, ones that weren’t as socially awkward and that could actually hold a conversation. That didn’t mean that he wanted to say yes though. 

Being around Shouyou too much probably wouldn’t help his wandering thoughts right now.

Shouyou finally seemed to notice the reluctance that practically rolled off of Kenma in waves and it seemed he had a plan for such reluctance, Kenma thought, as he watched in surprise as Shouyou’s knees hit the floor of the cafeteria hard.

Shouyou had answered his wish and had released Kenma’s shoulders but Kenma could hardly feel relieved at this point because seeing Shouyou on his knees definitely wasn’t helping Kenma’s state of mind as he began to picture Shouyou in the same position but in a much different scenario.

“Please, please, please, please!” Shouyou started to beg causing Kuroo to laugh, and Shouyou shot a glare in his direction before continuing his chant, eyes closed and hands clasped together not noticing Kenma freeze up where he was sitting.

Kuroo noticed him freeze, of course. What didn’t he notice. 

Kenma knew he was blushing. Knew that Kuroo noticed him blushing and when his eyes flicked in his friends direction he knew nothing good could come from the grin that had formed on Kuroo’s face. His thoughts didn’t stay on Kuroo for long though as his focus was once more brought into the fantasy that Shouyou surely couldn’t know he was creating in Kenma’s mind due to his position. Oh god, he should really stop thinking things like that about some innocent first year.

Slightly thankful to be startled out of his thoughts by an arm going around his shoulders Kenma peeked over at Kuroo and winced visibly at the seemingly knowing look present on his face. The thankful feeling disappeared almost instantly. Kuroo had a gleam in his eyes that made Kenma squirm and his suspicion that no good could possibly come from that look was confirmed when Kuroo opened his mouth.

“Hey, hey.” Kuroo started, causing Shouyou to pause in his begging and turn his eyes to him, though Kuroo was focused only on Kenma. “Why don’t you go Kenma, it might be good for you.” 

His smirk grew even wider and Kenma began to dread what else he could possibly say. “Playing with others that is.”

Kenma noticed Shouyou cock his head to the side in confusion but before he could say anything Kuroo continued.

“Of course I don’t know exactly what kind of play you like, but I’d suggest—“

Kenma hurriedly stood up, interrupting whatever Kuroo had been about to say, knowing that he definitely didn’t want him to finish that sentence. Not with Shouyou right there looking at them. Maybe not ever. Frankly Kenma was frightened to know what kind of suggestions Kuroo would come up with. 

“Sure, Shouyou.” He answered, still unwilling but anything would be better than having Kuroo continue to talk.

Shouyou scrambled up from the floor, smiling once again, seeming to forget all about the exchange between the two Nekoma players. 

Excited, Shouyou exclaimed loudly jumping into the air, causing Kenma to shuffle further away in surprise and he glanced away when Shouyou turned to beam at him.

“Thanks Kenma!” 

“Yeah.” 

~

 

I really need to leave. 

That one thought kept playing in Kenma’s head like an annoying mantra as he once again had to shake away stray thoughts of Shouyou. 

Kenma had managed to not think anything compromising through the first three sets, barely glancing at Shouyou, but by the fourth his eyes had begun to stray to the orange haired spiker.

He started noticing small things at first. The way his hair moved as he ran towards the net. How he would clench his hands waiting for another set. The bright smile that he would give whenever he brought the ball back to Kenma.

They were on their seventh set now and Kenma’s thoughts weren’t anywhere near decent.

Shouyou’s legs, currently tensed, and getting ready to jump. What would it feel like to have them wrapped around his waist? 

I need to stop.

Shouyou’s hand reaching out as he soared through the air. Callused hands touching him. Running through his hair, scratching at his back, touching, grabbing. Would he be tentative? Scared due to inexperience, or would he have the same initiative that he has during volleyball. 

I really should leave now.

Eyes wide with glee, Shouyou smiled, watching the ball slam onto the other side of the net in bounds, scoring an imaginary point against an imaginary opponent.

Shouyou’s eyes wouldn’t look like that. There’d be wanting in his eyes, wanting Kenma to touch him, to give him release that Kenma would deny him if only to see that look in his eyes.

Stop.

Shouyou wouldn’t be smiling. He’d be gasping for breath, incoherent noises would be ripped from him. Kenma wanted to know what noises Shouyou would make if he touched him, gliding his hands across his chest feeling firm muscles under his hands. He’d run his fingers down Shouyou’s spine, across his abdomen and downward watching his expression, listening to the keening noises of want. Kenma enjoyed watching people, learning what people wanted from there expressions was easy and he’d watch Shouyou intently and use everything he learned from touching Shouyou to his advantage. 

I really need to leave. Now.

Kenma grabbed his bag, ignoring Shouyou’s protests, knowing that if he stayed on that court any longer he would definitely do something he really did want to, but really shouldn’t. 

Seven tosses. 

Better than last time, at least he’s learning to control his thoughts a bit. Last time he’d only been able to do five before he’d been overwhelmed at his thoughts and had quickly rushed away.

“Kenma, toss more please! Just one more?” Shouyou’s voice was pleading and getting closer and Kenma didn’t look back as he hiked his bag onto his shoulder and set his sights on the exit. Of course he didn’t make it there. Tugged back by a firm hand on his arm which caused his heartbeat to rise, as Shouyou’s touch always did, and his foot to misstep and then he’s falling and he could feel Shouyou try to catch him only to fail and come down with him. 

Kenma realized too late that he shouldn’t have twisted his body during the fall.

He barely registered anything other than Shouyou’s position above him. Hands on either side of his head, legs straddling his waist almost like how Kenma had been picturing them earlier but this is real and so much better and Kenma liked it. He didn’t want Shouyou to come to his senses and move, though he would like to see the blush that Kenma was sure would dust his pale skin after Shouyou finally realized just how much of a compromising position they were actually in.

If I reached up now I could touch him, Kenma thinks, and he wants to. He wants to glide his fingers across hard muscle, wants to grab hold of bright orange hair that he’s sure is softer than it looks and before Kenma is able to realize what he’s doing his hands are already there. It is soft. Far softer than Kenma expected and it’s a pleasant feeling, being able to run his fingers through Shouyou’s hair. Being able to touch him.

Somewhere in the back of Kenma’s mind Shouyou’s confused face is registering and he knows he should stop. That he shouldn’t be doing this to Shouyou, someone far too innocent. 

He didn’t listen. He grabbed hold of the back of Shouyou’s head pulling him down until their breaths were mingling and Kenma could almost taste the mint of Shouyou's gum. Shouyou’s eyes were wide with questions that refused to come out of his mouth and Kenma knew there wouldn’t be any going back if he continued so he closed his eyes and pulled him down further.

**Author's Note:**

> I thought I'd end it there... sorry sorry... I hope you don't hate the ending. I kinda do...
> 
> yoooooo, come at me!! *wink wink* [Tumblr](http://shxuhei.tumblr.com/) and [Twitter](https://twitter.com/kozumeshouyou)


End file.
